Week 11 Story: In Pursuit of a Jewel
Bhama crept through the shadows. She was currently tailing her uncle, Prasenajit, while he was traveling to another country. Recently her father, Satrajit, claimed that he had acquired a jewel known as the Syamantaka from the Sun God that would give him fifty measures of gold per day. Bhama did not doubt the power of this jewel, but she did doubt her father's story of its origin. She knew he must have stolen it at some point while he had gone to visit those aboriginal people in the forest. Her uncle borrowed it because it also has the power to protect its holder from the dangers of the forest. She followed him now in hopes to recover it and return the jewel to its rightful owners.
Suddenly a lion burst out from the brush in front of Prasenajit. He squealed in terror. "B-b-back y-you b-b-beast!" he yelled. He thrust the jewel out in front of him in the direction of the lion. It snarled and prowled around him in a circle. Prasenajit's legs were shaking wildly and uncontrollably. Bhama could almost here his heart racing in his chest. She tried to stay as still as possible. She could see her uncle was now hyperventilating. Finally, he collapsed, and the jewel fell out of his hand onto the ground beside him.
The lion took a moment to calculate the situation. Then it moved towards him. Before it could get too close, an arrow struck the animal. It yowled then ran away. It left a trail of blood. Bhama held her breath. Was it safe to come out? Would she get shot too if she tried? A huge man in bearskin came out of the brush and approached her collapsed uncle. He knelt down and picked up the jewel. He looked over to where Bhama hid. Her own heartbeat quickened. He stared for another moment then got up and disappeared back into the brush.
Bhama waited for a bit before gaining the courage to come out of her hiding place. When she did, she came over to where Prasenajit lay. He was now more of a grey color. She knelt down to check if he was still breathing or had a pulse. He was dead. What a cowardly fool, thought Bhama. With nothing more she could do about her uncle or the jewel, Bhama began to make her way back home. She knew that once her father found out about Prasenajit's death, he would blame Krishna, and Krishna would come to investigate to prove his innocence. She decided she would come back then.
Author's Note. This story is based on a section of the book Krishna Krishna by __. My story includes some summary of what it's based on, but I will repeat it here. There is a story of Satrajit, of the Yadava clan like Kirshna, who acquired a jewel that would grant 50 measures of gold a day. He claimed he got it from the Sun God, but in reality he stole it from a nearby aboriginal tribe who worshiped Rama as a deity. The jewel supposedly had belonged to Sita. His brother asks for the jewel for protection as he goes to a neighboring country, and he dies along the way because of a lion, and the aboriginals recover the jewel. Satrajit blames Krishna for his brother's death, so Krishna goes out to investigate.
The story of this jewel really fascinated me. In the original story, there was not much detail in what happened when Prasenajit died, so I decided to expand on that area. I actually wanted to write about what happened in the style of a murder mystery, but I have been too burned out this week to try, so that also means this is not my best work. That is okay.
Bibliography. "Bhama, the Brave" from Krishna Krishna by Indira Parthasarathy, link to Overview
Suddenly a lion burst out from the brush in front of Prasenajit. He squealed in terror. "B-b-back y-you b-b-beast!" he yelled. He thrust the jewel out in front of him in the direction of the lion. It snarled and prowled around him in a circle. Prasenajit's legs were shaking wildly and uncontrollably. Bhama could almost here his heart racing in his chest. She tried to stay as still as possible. She could see her uncle was now hyperventilating. Finally, he collapsed, and the jewel fell out of his hand onto the ground beside him.
The lion took a moment to calculate the situation. Then it moved towards him. Before it could get too close, an arrow struck the animal. It yowled then ran away. It left a trail of blood. Bhama held her breath. Was it safe to come out? Would she get shot too if she tried? A huge man in bearskin came out of the brush and approached her collapsed uncle. He knelt down and picked up the jewel. He looked over to where Bhama hid. Her own heartbeat quickened. He stared for another moment then got up and disappeared back into the brush.
Bhama waited for a bit before gaining the courage to come out of her hiding place. When she did, she came over to where Prasenajit lay. He was now more of a grey color. She knelt down to check if he was still breathing or had a pulse. He was dead. What a cowardly fool, thought Bhama. With nothing more she could do about her uncle or the jewel, Bhama began to make her way back home. She knew that once her father found out about Prasenajit's death, he would blame Krishna, and Krishna would come to investigate to prove his innocence. She decided she would come back then.
Gem inside a gem (let's pretend it's the Syamantaka)
Web Source: Wikimedia Commons
Author's Note. This story is based on a section of the book Krishna Krishna by __. My story includes some summary of what it's based on, but I will repeat it here. There is a story of Satrajit, of the Yadava clan like Kirshna, who acquired a jewel that would grant 50 measures of gold a day. He claimed he got it from the Sun God, but in reality he stole it from a nearby aboriginal tribe who worshiped Rama as a deity. The jewel supposedly had belonged to Sita. His brother asks for the jewel for protection as he goes to a neighboring country, and he dies along the way because of a lion, and the aboriginals recover the jewel. Satrajit blames Krishna for his brother's death, so Krishna goes out to investigate.
The story of this jewel really fascinated me. In the original story, there was not much detail in what happened when Prasenajit died, so I decided to expand on that area. I actually wanted to write about what happened in the style of a murder mystery, but I have been too burned out this week to try, so that also means this is not my best work. That is okay.
Bibliography. "Bhama, the Brave" from Krishna Krishna by Indira Parthasarathy, link to Overview
Molly,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading this adaptation of your story that you read. I like that you added in your own part of the story to keep the plot going without missing info. I thought this was a really interesting read and need to come back to your blog for more of these great stories. Great job writing and keep up the good work!
I enjoyed your writing for this story! I think you have a great foundation for additional details and events. You could expand upon the death of Prasenajit, as it was sort of fuzzy what happened, and you could add more to what happens to Bhama once she witnesses his death. I think there are quite a few things you could do to continue the story if you wanted!
ReplyDeleteHey there Molly!
ReplyDeleteWow! I really loved your version of this story. I also wrote my own version of this story so obviously I was drawn to it as well. Our versions are very different and I definitely enjoy your take! I also like the picture you chose for yours way better! But nice work, I can’t wait to read more!
Hi Molly! I think quite a few people read this story this week. This is a lovely adaption that adds a lot of clarity to the scene. It also has a lot of palpable tension that you describe really nicely that makes the story even more intense. I really liked the picture you chose too. It's a really cool gem, cool enough to be the legendary stone, I think.
ReplyDeleteHey Molly.
ReplyDeleteI really liked your story. This is one story that I have not read the original version of it so your author’s note was really helpful. All in all, it is a really good story and I hope to come back and read more of your stories. Good luck with the rest of your semester.
Hey Molly! I think you did a great job of adding necessary details to make the plot more suspenseful! I could picture everything nicely. I haven't read the story you based yours off of, but I still followed along pretty well and enjoyed reading it! Your author's note was helpful in understanding the whole concept and cleared up anything I may have been confused about :)
ReplyDeleteHello Molly !
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job on this story telling ! Even though your story is literally a retelling. You did an exceptional job on your authored note ! It would help someone who has not read the story yet ! I also think the way you wrote the story is great because I was engaged and I felt like I was there ! I am looking forward to reading more of your stories!
Hi Molly!
ReplyDeleteI really liked your version of this story. I thought it was smart to have a third party observer narrate the story and just witness what happened. I thought the original story was so interesting when I read it, especially since Rama and Krishna are both avatars of Vishnu. You did a great job adapting the story and making it your own. Well done!
-Elizabeth
Hi Molly!
ReplyDeleteI also read "Krishna Krishna" and was really curious to see where you would take the story once I realized what it was. I think you did a great job with it and I'm glad that you decided to expand on the death of Bhama's uncle. I also like that you chose to leave the man who shot the lion and took the jewel as a mystery as I think it adds to the short stories that we tell.
Great job!